A nudist's guide to surviving the end of the world

As we all know, it’s a 100 per cent certified, guaranteed, rubber-stamped rumour that the world will end on December 21st at 11:11am GMT (or 6:11am EST for our American readers) to be precise.

It must be true – the Australian Prime Minister said so (presumably while under significant pressure from a lobbyist representing the interests of ancient Mayan calendar manufacturers)!

Thankfully, in this worrying time, the American Association for Nude Recreation (AANR) has suggested a few ways of approaching this most auspicious of dates. It would be remiss of us not to pass these helpful hints and tips to you, our beloved readers.

WARNING: since none of us has ever experienced the end of the world before, we’re unable to confirm if the following ideas will be of any assistance. If you try them out, do let us know (in the afterlife – there’ll be Twitter in the afterlife, right?)

NB: Below, we quote directly the AANR.

  • Try sleeping in the nude on December 20th – you may wake up to find clothes are a non-essential in the ever-after.
  • Hang around the house in the nude – on the 22nd you may find continuing the practice on Earth is quite heavenly.
  • Promise yourself, if the world survives through the 21st, that you’ll take a Nakation (holiday in a nudist resort) in 2013.
  • If you live in the sunbelt or plan a warm weather winter getaway, make sure you take a skinny dip – it’s how the Mayans enjoyed frolicking in the sea.
  • Strip down and enjoy the sunshine radiating through your windows. It is widely accepted that sunlight counteracts the winter blues. In fact, studies indicate that humans need at least 20 minutes a day of sunshine over at least 75 per cent of the body to help prevent a vitamin D deficiency – of which one notable side effect is depression.
  • Multiple recent studies have linked weight gain and obesity to lack of sleep. One of the most popular ways that people are getting a better night’s sleep is by sleeping in the nude. Those who have shed their pyjamas and inhibitions are reporting that they sleep better due to increased comfort.

So there you have it. We have a sneaky suspicion that if we were on the verge of nuclear Armageddon, the good people of the AANR might have come up with some very similar thoughts and ideas.

Written by insider city guide series Hg2 | A Hedonist’s guide to…

(photo courtesy of aanr.com)